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Fess up to your most recent collisions

 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
andy wrote:
Does punching a boarder in the kidneys who was toe-siding down a piste towards our group stopped at the side of the piste count as a collision?
It counts as assault...
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
HandyHand wrote:
andy wrote:
Does punching a boarder in the kidneys who was toe-siding down a piste towards our group stopped at the side of the piste count as a collision?
It counts as assault...


Counts as appropriate pre-emptive defence Laughing
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Last season in Val Thorens on the Cristaux black run where the snow was boilerplate ice and smooth rather than the usual bumpyness of the run.

It was very very difficult going as we hit the steep part and the surface was incredibly difficult to get any sort of grip at all.

A teenage girl was on one side of the piste and I was on the other at about the same level and we just turned in on each other colliding gently at pretty low speed. My skis came off and as I tried to stand up just starting sliding down the slope faster and faster with no control, skis or poles. I think I stopped about 500 metres further down. It was pretty scary.

Straight afterwards I looked on here and youtube to gain techniques on how to stop by flipping onto the stomach and basically doing 'press up' position.
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Just below the top of Plenney lift at Morzine, where you meet your instructor. He and I are standing right on the edge of the piste, him facing it, me with my back to it. We are chatting away about what the next drill is to be. Suddenly he stops, mid-sentence. Wam! I am taken out by an out-of-control beginner on a snowboard. Because I have the upper ski slightly in front of the downhill one, she only hits the downhill leg, rotating the back of the ski down the slope to what seems an impossible angle. After what seems like an age we come to a stop with my legs twisted so much that the instructor is sure I have done a knee. He rushes down, unclips my ski to relieve the twist. I get up, put my ski back on and we continue the lesson after accepting apologies from the boarder. A lucky escape, but my knee was a bit sore for the rest of the holiday...
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Meribel - probably 2003, I skied over the back of a woman's skis. Just lost focus for a moment. Grovelled.

Tignes - powder day - possibly 06. Boarder comes into the back of me on Trolles just after the drop off into the final schuss. A year later, turned left down the slope in roughly the same place. French woman in a gold fartbag T bones me. I stay upright, she goes into the snow bank and lets rip. Quite why eludes still me.

Tignes 2004? - drunk Austrian tries to come between me and a snow cannon. Comes off second best despite me being 6 foot and 11 stone. His friends mock him mercilessly for having hit a British gaper.

Morzine 2012? I'm keeping my distance from a female snowboarder who is a clearly nervous beginner. She has all the technique of a baby giraffe on ketamine. I get too close, she catches an edge and I end up in the trees by the side of the cat track. Not technically my fault according to the FIS thing only people on here pay attention to but still my fault if you see what I mean.
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Not sure if it counts as a collision and sure wasn't my fault. Doing the white ring I entered the lift line with several skiers (I am a boarder), go through gate and shuffle up pronto to the loading line only to find some idiot dives through at last minute to join his mates and then decides to take his place on the seat directly behind me and essentially takes my place leaving me nowhere to go, the others try to drag me on and get me to the seat at the other side but to no avail, board catches and down I go, fortunately I had the wherewithall to duck and avoid being skelped by the chair which the liftie didn't stop. Eventually make my way out and get on a later lift, reach the top and no sign of the perpetrator to apologise, couldn't believe it.
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 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
I'm just back from hospital, a €90 taxi fare from St Jean de Maurienne but at least I had a free ride down thanks to carre neige or else that would've been another €700.

I was on my own at Valloire taking a second easy blue to transit over towards Valmeinier. I remember everything up to 200m to the lift, I was carving the middle third of an empty piste then the next thing I know I'm stood by the lift in a confused state wondering where I was. I have a vague recollection of a young skier looking back up at me from 20m further down asking if I was ok but since I can't remember any collision or falling or how I got to the lift I'm not sure this is a true recollection.

After some minutes slowly coming to my senses I walked around to the lifties cabin and told them I thought I had concussion, and they took it from there. I have clear recall from about then but just have a complete blank for perhaps 5 minutes. I'm physically ok apart from a swelling on my upper lip though my neck muscles are just now starting to feel a bit sore.

Anyway, the doctors at the hospital (EHIC) gave me a clean bill of health after physical and neurological tests, full bloods and ecg. Decided a CT scan was unnecessary.

This is the first time anything like this has happened to me and I'm quite bemused by it. My brand new board has damage to the deck on the toe edge at the back but my shiny new helmet is unmarked. It just shows that a (glancing?) collision or fall with no obvious injuries could potentially be more serious.
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
A while since I had any collisions last one: Idiot Scottish teenager took me out on a piste and tried blaming it on the line I took.
Nearly swallowing his own teeth by the time I'd finished with him, he won't do it again. Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad Evil or Very Mad
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You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
@BoardieK, wow that sounds terrible. Glad they have given you a clean bill of health but obviously look after yourself.
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Ski the Net with snowHeads
@BoardieK, Do you have anyone who can keep an eye on you for the next day or two? I have thought you'd need to be kept under observation following a concussion. Take it easy fella and hope there are no delayed effects.
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 snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
halfhand wrote:
@BoardieK, Do you have anyone who can keep an eye on you for the next day or two? I have thought you'd need to be kept under observation following a concussion. Take it easy fella and hope there are no delayed effects.

Yes, my wife is here and won't be letting go play for a few days yet thanks.
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 And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
@halfhand, +1
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 So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
BoardieK wrote:
halfhand wrote:
@BoardieK, Do you have anyone who can keep an eye on you for the next day or two? I have thought you'd need to be kept under observation following a concussion. Take it easy fella and hope there are no delayed effects.

Yes, my wife is here and won't be letting go play for a few days yet thanks.


Ahh good. Opportunity to chill and be pampered Laughing
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
Scarlet wrote:
I was very apologetic, she was livid and then received some strong words from my buddies who had witnessed it from behind her.


I think you should have had a proper claws-out cat fight over it. Nothing quite as entertaining as a full on, insult screaming, hair pulling, face slapping lady fight. That'd make for a good day, regardless of conditions
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
@kb36, at the world cup at Les Houches last year, there were French police going round on skis keeping people in order. And yet it was the French policeman who did exactly this to me! Was with a young child (who I assumed to be his son), him and his son pushed through the gates directly after me and a friend had gone through... obviously being world cup weekend there was no vacant space on the lift chair

So I just ended up on somebody's lap until the mat ran out and then I was face down in the snow. And the policeman was convinced it was my fault.

They stopped the lift and I was a bit worried about being dragged away by an angry policeman, but the lifty tore him a new one and sent him to the back of the queue. I still got a face full of snow and looked like a huge tw@t.
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 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
Can only recall one time I've actually hit someone properly....at the Oktobertest at Hemel Embarassed Playing about on bumps, caught an edge at exactly the time a guy below me went in a direction I wasn't expecting. Crashed into him (sort of hugged him really) and both of us ended up on the ground. Completely my fault, I just had a split second of being out of control because of my own stupidity around a guy that was learning. Lucky neither of us hurt and I was surprised that he wasn't angrier with me because it was clearly my fault.
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
dp wrote:
Scarlet wrote:
I was very apologetic, she was livid and then received some strong words from my buddies who had witnessed it from behind her.


I think you should have had a proper claws-out cat fight over it. Nothing quite as entertaining as a full on, insult screaming, hair pulling, face slapping lady fight. That'd make for a good day, regardless of conditions


Erm, I think that fantasy will just have to stay that way. Not really my thing, either.
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Scarlet wrote:
dp wrote:
Scarlet wrote:
I was very apologetic, she was livid and then received some strong words from my buddies who had witnessed it from behind her.


I think you should have had a proper claws-out cat fight over it. Nothing quite as entertaining as a full on, insult screaming, hair pulling, face slapping lady fight. That'd make for a good day, regardless of conditions


Erm, I think that fantasy will just have to stay that way. Not really my thing, either.


What, fighting itself or just the hair pulling and screaming insults bit? I'd only assumed that a feisty Yorkshire lass like yourself would enjoy the occasional piste-side scrap.
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dp wrote:
What, fighting itself or just the hair pulling and screaming insults bit? I'd only assumed that a feisty Yorkshire lass like yourself would enjoy the occasional piste-side scrap.

Well your problem there is with the assumption that I'm a Yorkshire lass (are they particularly known for fighting?!) when I'm clearly not.
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.

My toe had a collision with my pellet burner... does that count?
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Yesterday... in champoluc... chap hit me from bhind on a black run.... now in Aosta hospital waiting fo surgery on broken fib and tib.....
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 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
@yorkshirelad, ouch sorry to hear that, I hope you make a good recovery
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 After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
After all it is free Go on u know u want to!
valais2 wrote:
2016 - I am no gravity merchant, but for once I decided to get air (no rotation) off a lip and onto a nice steep piste to the right. Unfortunately, unsighted, a boarder to my right decided to do the same thing. We met in mid air on basically the same trajectory. Each of our immediate reactions was to say 'Desole! Desole!' whilst fending each other off with windmilling arms. We managed to avoid being entangled, stayed banging and knocking together until we landed, managed to hold it together whilst hitting the snow, and separated nicely - both grinning broadly to each other.


Thats an exact replay for my mates accident from 2000, only his ended with him in Mammoth Lakes medical centre overnight with concussion and the other guy being emergency airlifted to Los Angles with a very serious brain bleed. Sad
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 You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
You'll get to see more forums and be part of the best ski club on the net.
Must of been about 2 years ago in PDS over in Les Gets. I was on a holiday with 4 snowboarders (I know) rolling eyes and we're skiing down to L'Encrenaz when one of the boarders just stacks in a heap. I can't remember if he was trying to avoid a little kid, or if he just fell for no reason, like you do.

Anyway we were all in stitches, I came out with all the typical boarder lines being the only skier there, before I inexplicably slip sliding straight into him taking us both out in a heap and ejecting my ski onto its own small adventure that ended half way down the piste. Upon retrieving the ski, it took me a good 5 minutes to get the bindings to engage as the impact and weight of said boarder had resulted in a dead leg and myself resembling more of a Flamingo than any sort of competent skier, much to their amusement.

Moral of the story ... keep your mouth shut, or never ski with boarders wink
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 Ski the Net with snowHeads
Ski the Net with snowHeads
Coming down one of the runs into Zurs (may have been one of the other villages) that ends in a long flat section where you need to carry a decent amount of speed to avoid some poling. I'm merrily cruising along when a teenage lad skis past me at close to warp speed and then immediately catches his inside edge and falls in fairly horrendous fashion. I was convinced I was about to have a fairly disastrous off as had no time to turn, but by some miracle managed to go over his tumbling skis and then stop about an inch in front of where he'd come to rest. Remarkably he seemed to be completely fine, but instead of thanking me for stopping complained that the "piste was uneven" clicked his ski's in and polled off.... leaving me a 250m push into town!

Only other collision was waiting at the top of Christine in VT when our mate decided to skid to a stop and shower us in snow, lacked the skill to do this unfortunately so his skis went from under him and we went down like dominoes. No injuries but the beers were very much on him!
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 snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
snowHeads are a friendly bunch.
kb36 wrote:
Not sure if it counts as a collision and sure wasn't my fault. Doing the white ring I entered the lift line with several skiers (I am a boarder), go through gate and shuffle up pronto to the loading line only to find some idiot dives through at last minute to join his mates and then decides to take his place on the seat directly behind me and essentially takes my place leaving me nowhere to go, the others try to drag me on and get me to the seat at the other side but to no avail, board catches and down I go, fortunately I had the where withall to duck and avoid being skelped by the chair which the liftie didn't stop. Eventually make my way out and get on a later lift, reach the top and no sign of the perpetrator to apologise, couldn't believe it.


Very similar at Les Carroz a few years ago. Only a few people in funnel to lift - corbalanche chair to tete des saix from le lac IIRC - apart from several late middle aged Frenchmen. I go through gates with a couple of said Frenchmen, I'm just about to sit when I find myself settling on the 3rd Frenchman's lap after he'd made a last minute dash and blindsided me. We manage to shuffle ourselves into a less "involved" positions when I find my ski has pinged off. Said intimate acquaintance was very apologetic as were his buddies and as we reached the top all shouted to the liftie that I was missing a ski. He ensured I stayed upright and they all waited until they saw my ski being returned. I felt rather guilty for quick lesson I gave him in the rather more colourful aspects of the English language Embarassed

My fist did have a collision with a skier at Mont Vallon in the mid 90's. I had stopped at the side of the piste above the Mont Vallon Gondola to check which lift my mates had gone to, when I was wacked from above and behind. This fool then yelled at me and gesticulated wildly before trying to give me a gentle push off - hands towards my shoulders. He hadn't taken into account that although I probably looked a crap skier I was a 17 stone prop who could stand his ground and didn't take kindly to being at the end of an unjustified gallic rant...so I chinned him... not too hard, but enough to conclude matters. wink
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 And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
And love to help out and answer questions and of course, read each other's snow reports.
Now a lot of you lot seem to be missing the point of "fess up" - it's the ones where you are at fault! Very Happy
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 So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
So if you're just off somewhere snowy come back and post a snow report of your own and we'll all love you very much
[
Quote:

Only other collision was waiting at the top of Christine in VT when our mate decided to skid to a stop and shower us in snow, lacked the skill to do this unfortunately so his skis went from under him and we went down like dominoes.

God I'm going to sound like an awful grump but having watched some serious knee injuries caused by low speed falls my sense of humour for this stuff is really limited. For example, when I worked a ski season the Company MD was out right at the start of the season and for a laugh skied slowly between the legs of one of the staff from behind (sort of nested snow plough) causing a low speed twisting fall and a ruptured cruciate. I love skiing and if someone wrecked the sport for me by fookin' around I'd be utterly gutted.
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 You know it makes sense.
You know it makes sense.
@yorkshirelad, oh no! Best wishes for a full recovery.
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 Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
Otherwise you'll just go on seeing the one name:
@flangesax, oh dear. Can you get a ski boot on? Hope so.
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 Poster: A snowHead
Poster: A snowHead
Quote:

God I'm going to sound like an awful grump but having watched some serious knee injuries caused by low speed falls my sense of humour for this stuff is really limited. For example, when I worked a ski season the Company MD was out right at the start of the season and for a laugh skied slowly between the legs of one of the staff from behind (sort of nested snow plough) causing a low speed twisting fall and a ruptured cruciate. I love skiing and if someone wrecked the sport for me by fookin' around I'd be utterly gutted.


Agreed, it was one of those where I bounced up fuming (suffered from knee injuries previously) and only calmed down once it became clear that everyone was ok.
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 Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
Obviously A snowHead isn't a real person
flangesax wrote:

My toe had a collision with my pellet burner... does that count?
Was it acting in an unpredictable way? If so it's at least partly to blame.
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 Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Well, the person's real but it's just a made up name, see?
Genuinely LOL @Steilhang
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Touch wood - only two collisions. Both with the same ski buddy.

The first was on an over-exuberant first day on my return to skiing as an adult - I barrelled over my friends tails in Valmorel. Neither of us went over, though he was close. And mighty cross.

The second about 10 years later in April slush coming down from an afternoon in the Moosewirt in St. Anton. For some reason* neither of us were completely in control. We mirrored each other - struggling round a few turns until eventually we slowly skied into a manly embrace in the middle of the piste. Again, neither of us fell over. Not even through laughing.

*who knows why, we'd been fine in the morning Wink

And now I think about it, there was a third. And a fourth. But they weren't recent, so don't fit the thread. And one involved monoskis, so was only to be expected.
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 Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
Anyway, snowHeads is much more fun if you do.
last season on a snowy day my 72 year old father turned into me from above on a fairly flat traverse, my sister and friends who were with us thought it hilarious as my father stayed upright whilst I ended up (and I've no idea how this happened as I couldn't replicate it again if I tried) sliding along for a few metres on my helmet in what apparently looked to aforementioned observers as a perfect headstand. Very grateful for the helmet that day as I don't fancy being scalped on a ski trip.
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Steilhang wrote:
flangesax wrote:

My toe had a collision with my pellet burner... does that count?
Was it acting in an unpredictable way? If so it's at least partly to blame.




Technically it was the uphill door, the toe was just being predictable below it.
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 Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
Then you can post your own questions or snow reports...
@Hurtle, not for a while... it's a wee bit numb down there, stitched and nail-less!
I guess it could have been avoided if the toe had checked uphill along the blindside first!
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